Quotes from Interviews Used in the Book
- Marcela, nuclear engineer: "I would never ask for [a bonus].
If it wasn't freely given, I wouldn't ask for it. I might gripe about
it at home, but that would be the extent of it."
- Ellen, senior partner at a law firm:"[My father told me],
'Honey, you know you can't act like a tiger. You have to act like a
- Becky, a journalist: "When I go into a negotiation . .
. I think about maintaining that relationship before I think about my
own [needs] really."
- Gabriela, symphony orchestra general manger: "I just said
thank you [for a raise]. . . . [The board members] are probably wondering-how
good can she be at negotiating [for the orchestra] if she can't even
negotiate for herself."
- Susannah, political strategist: "I just feel so guilty.
I worry that I'm putting them in a difficult situation, especially if
I'm asking for something that I think will be hard for them to give
- Eleanor, literature professor and biographer: "When it
came down to it, I backed down because I didn't want [my editor] to
- Lindsey, research chemist: "I get so nervous in negotiating
that I capitulate very quickly."
- Helena, advertising executive: "I'm better at asking for
other people, and I can be really direct . . . but not so much for myself."
- Stephanie, administrative assistant: "I tend to think
people are pretty fair, so maybe I'm too trusting and expect that I'm
getting what I deserve in that I work really hard."
- Christine, investment banker: "I think it's up to the
people that you work for . . . to identify [superior work] and keep
current with what's in the industry."
- Angela, marketing director: "I don't think I ever want
something that's that far out of my reach."
- Joan, magazine editor: "I was so naïve and clueless,
and I just had never really made a lot of money in my life, and I didn't
need a lot of money, so what I asked for seemed like a lot of money.
And it was just not a lot of money."
- Lory, theater production manager: "I have a hard time
putting a monetary figure on the work that I do."
- Emma, social science researcher: "I realized . . . that
I could have really negotiated for much more. . . but I didn't. Because
I accepted, 'Oh, I want to tie in with the range. I should feel lucky
I have this job.